Today I yet again rehash Twitter comedy from a couple of years ago. But I was looking for something from an old Twitter conversation and found these tweets in response to a hashtag the hilarious John Moe of Wits fame started called ‪#‎SelfLoathingBillyJoel‬ and it was making me laugh too hard not to post:

• Only the good die young / While I live on, without purpose or meaning
• In the middle of the night / I go walking in my sleep / Look away, don’t look at me, I’m hideous
• What’s the matter with the clothes I’m wearing? / STUPID ME I’M SO FUCKING STUPID
• Uptown girl / She’s been living in her uptown world / I deserve scorn
• Tell her about it / She’s eventually going to find out she’s wasting her life with me
• Anthony works in the grocery store / Savin’ his pennies for someday / I sit alone in darkness / A stain
• We might be laughing a bit too loud / God, I’m so sorry, I ruined your perfect evening
• Yes, they’re sharing a drink they call loneliness / They never ask me to join them
• Go ahead with your own life / Mine’s not worth living

I will also take this opportunity to share my favorite Billy Joke:

“In the middle of the night, I go walking in my sleep.” – Billy Joel, explaining to police why his car is in the neighbor’s living room.