A ContainsEggs Cry for Help

There are two things I need you to help me find:

(1) In the early 1980s, there was a TV public service announcement by the Department of Labor that educated viewers about their minimum wage entitlements. I know this one existed; I recall the song, a punchy, uplifting soundtrack for a 30 second inspirational montage of happy people celebrating minimum wage employment. Some sample lyrics:

“Three-ten, three-ten an hour is federal minimum wage / For most jobs your hired to do / You’ve got three-ten coming to you”

The spot ended with a flourish: A race runner joyously broke through the finish tape, victorious in his quest for stifling poverty. As he pumped his fist with unbridled delight, the song punctuated our shared exhilaration: “You’ve got three-ten . . . YEAH! coming to you.”

I have searched online to no avail, and even my friends with encyclopedic pop culture knowledge don’t remember it. It would comfort me if someone acknowledged remembering it. It would thrill me to the point of Kelly Ripaesque giddiness if someone has or can point to a clip.

(2) In the sixth grade (1982), we had to watch a drug scare film in science class. I recall a scene with a young man, maybe 20 or so, who had suffered a psychotic break after taking PCP. Institutionalized, he was dancing atop his bed singing “Shadow Dancing,” apparently now under the delusion that he was Andy Gibb. I laughed aloud and the teacher asked me if I thought something was funny. I replied, “Are you watching the same thing I am?” Then she made me leave the classroom.

Now, I challenge my own memory of this incident. First of all, you’d think a school anti-drug filmstrip with PCP Andy Gibb singing “Shadow Dancing” would’ve found its way to the Internet by now. Google comes up empty, at least for me.

Secondly, my memory seems to have made me an impossibly clever and quick-witted 11-year-old.

But the details of the film seem unusually specific for my mind to have simply invented over the years, and I’ve been recounting some version of this incident for as long as I can remember. So I cling to hope that this cautionary educational gem did indeed exist. Please, someone out there, deliver me this humble Christmas wish.

Surely, someone among the double-digit daily readership here at ContainsEggs can help solve these mysteries.

UPDATE 2/3: An exciting breakthrough! It looks like someone else remembers the school drug-scare film, and that perhaps my memory failed me on the particular song. This person recalls the PCP kid singing Andy Gibb’s “I Just Want to Be Your Everything,” which in retrospect seems more appropriate for an angel dust overdose. But the other details were the same.¬†http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081121144317AAblDO9

7 thoughts on “A ContainsEggs Cry for Help

  1. Okay, I’m on the hunt. So far, I’ve found the most awesomely amazing movie ever in the history of movies. I’m talking about “Death Drug,” starring Phillip Michael Thomas of Miami Vice fame. Even if this isn’t the movie you watched in 6th grade, you’ve got to see this shit. A couple clips for your enjoyment:

  2. Christine, this is a transcendent work of cinema. First, let’s discuss that intro by Phillip Michael Thomas. His range of roles we might know him as: A doctor, a Buffalo Soldier, or a slick cop. Now that’s a body of work!

    Also, why was there even a piano in the room? And why has it never been tuned? There’s no explanation other than, “Phillip says if we don’t let him sing, he won’t record the intro. He’s really pissed about that ‘Heartbeat’ song being a hit.”

    And I think I found a clue that at least validates most of my memory on this one–adding an update to the original post.

  3. Hi, I am satylicki who posted the question regarding this same movie on yahoo answers three years ago (the breakthough you referred to). I would give my eyeteeth to see again that kid dosed on angel dust, jumping on his bed, singing Andy Gibb. If I’m not mistaken, he vascillated between thinking he was AG and Superman. Do you remember how they played the “drug”songs and flashed the lyrics on the screen that I referred to in my question? Everyone in my 6th grade class would sing along because duh they gave us the lyrics, what were we supposed to do? It is possible, however, these were two separate movies. If you EVER hear of any clues or see a video, for the love all that is good, please let me know so I can rest at night. Thanks so much!

    • I am so happy that the Internet brought you here. I really was starting to question my memory of that film, but you describe almost exactly as I recall it. And yes, I believe our troubled addict did switch between Superman and Andy Gibb. (The obvious question to me–why be just one at a time?)

      I also do recall a separate anti-drug film that they showed us the next year in which they played popular songs with drug references, and yes, it turned into a campfire singalong of Eric Clapton’s “Cocaine.” I’m almost sure they were separate films, as I recall seeing PCP Andy Gibb in the sixth grade and the Drug Party Singalong in the seventh grade.

      Mind if I ask where you grew up? I was in school in Smyrna, Georgia, a north suburb of Atlanta. Maybe we can track these down yet. And we need to hear “eyeteeth” more often.

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